It’s in those moments of feeling lost and untethered when you suddenly stumble into something that just feels right. It all clicks into place. When you had just been on that edge of asking ‘what the fuck are we doing here?’, and then it all comes into focus in this hallelujah moment.
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Once upon blotted-out time, the abject must have been a magnetized pole of covetousness. But the ashes of oblivion now serve as a screen and reflect aversion, repugnance. The clean and proper (in the sense of incorporated and incorporable) becomes filthy, the sought-after turns into the banished, fascination into shame. Then, forgotten time crops up suddenly and condenses into a flash of lightning an operation that, if it were thought out, would involve bringing together the two opposite terms but, on account of that flash, is discharged like thunder. The time of abjection is double: a time of oblivion and thunder, of veiled infinity and the moment when revelation bursts forth.
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Julia Kristeva | Powers of Horror: An Essay on Abjection